“Mike! You’ve got to say something to David! He’s throwing up on the sideline and is very nervous about today’s game!” Now this was not the first time I had been asked to “say something to someone” before a big game. I often get calls, texts, and requests to say words that will help someone perform better. Nor was this the first time that David had thrown up on the sideline before going out and performing big in a big game. He was a good friend and teammate of one of my sons, and they played on a great team with a great coach. I don’t remember exactly what I said, but I do remember that David and my son both had great games, and they won!

I often think of this conversation and the power of words. In fact, I was asked by a Mom just this week to communicate some words that would help an athlete the night before his big race after having a very disappointing race that very day. I sent her a text with some words to reinforce with him. I also sent him a text that night and the next morning, and he ran an incredible race qualifying for the Regional Track Meet.

Our words are powerful and important. Words can breathe death and defeat. They can also breathe life and victory into another person’s life. Words can disillusion and discourage us. They can also inspire and encourage us. The fact is that our words have power, and they have a tremendous amount of influence. As J. R. Miller said in his book The Building of Character: “There have been meetings of only a moment which have left impressions for life, for eternity. No one can understand that mysterious thing we call influence…yet…everyone of us continually exerts influence, either to heal, to bless, to leave marks of beauty; or to wound, to hurt, to poison, or stain our lives.”

Here are 3 things that we need to think about in using words:

• We need to choose our words wisely. Knowing words can hurt or heal, we need to think about our words and choose to speak words that help others. The power of words is fueled by the ability of choice. So often, people just let whatever words come out of their mouths or online through social media without stopping to think and consider: Is it wise to communicate these words in this moment? Key questions to also consider are: Is it helpful? Is it true? Is it productive? Is it constructive? Is it relevant and pertinent?
• We need to use our words to breathe life into others. People are struggling to find peace, courage, and faith to live life and pursue their purpose. Every day, you have an opportunity to breathe life into others by the words you choose to use. The presence of your positive words can truly impact others in a powerful and meaningful way and help them discover purpose along their path. A reinforcing and encouraging word from a leader. A resounding refrain of “I believe in you!” from a parent or coach. A reassuring reminder of “I Love you!” from a spouse. These are all moments that matter and create breakthrough opportunities for others to perform at their best, become the person they were created to be, and remember who is in on their team and in their corner.
• We need to share our words purposefully and generously. In choosing our words wisely and using words that breathe life into others, we need to make sure these moments are not just one-time occurrences. We don’t need to be like the man who said to his wife, “I told you I love you when we got married! I will let you know if anything changes.” Love and positive and productive words should be ongoing, consistent, and continual. You need to pour into others and also not play favorites by only singling out the ones who are the star performers or that you like the most. Your words should be purposeful in that they have depth and an intended purpose. You don’t need to say words just to say them or because you feel like you have to. Words, both positive and constructive, should be used to help build up and edify someone else to help them become who they were meant to be not tear them down and make them feel helpless and hopeless. We should say the right words, because we care about the other person on the receiving end.

In the work that I do in coaching, writing, speaking, and consulting, I get the opportunity to say a lot of words. In my roles as a leader, husband, father, mentor, friend, and Bible Study teacher, I am presented with many moments to breathe life into people who mean the most to me and that I have been entrusted with. In my role as a human being created by God, I have been given breath to purposefully and generously speak words that encourage others, give them hope and faith, and help them to maximize their God-given abilities and opportunities for what matters most. As I think about all of these roles, opportunities, and moments, I consider this aspirational and overriding purpose and lifelong mission and goal:

All I have ever been is a conduit for His Word.